The paradox of comparing ourselves to other people is that we become blind to what we already have in the face of what we don’t have. Our hearts are drawn into a place of assumption. We assume that everything is great for those who possess what we lack. -Lysa
Admit it, you are here because that blogpost title made you go “say what?” And you just had to see for yourself what this blogpost is about.
Admit another thing. Girls, you have looked at another woman and wished you had her hair, her legs, her eyes or her waist line. Perhaps even her chest. We want what we don’t have, and we assume that its so wonderful for those who have what we lack. Funny story (sorry to my male readers. You may just want to skip this part)- I am big chested and I have had other women, so often, tell me how much they wish they had what I am so “very blessed with.” This is how I respond –> “if you only knew how difficult it is to go clothes shopping!” I measure 32 inches in my band size, but the cup size is a different story (DDD). It makes it sooo difficult to find tops! And those super cute button up blouses? Ya, forget it. I could never wear those. And there is something to be said about the emotional toll an unsuccessful shopping trip can have on a girl…I admit, I have cried on more than one occasion in the fitting room.
When I complain about my big busts to my flat chested friends, they say to me “if you only knew how it feels to not have anything to fill your bra with. I’m a woman. I’m suppose to have boobs! Where are they?” My flat chested friends may not have the physical difficulty of finding clothes that fit (my gosh-they all wear the CUTEST clothes) and they may have more successful shopping trips than me, but they have to deal on a daily basis with the feeling that they are missing out on something. We both assume that the other person has it better off, when in reality, we both are just unhappy with what we have. As Lysa (author of Made to Crave) says, “The struggles are similar, just in a different size package.”
As they say, the grass is always greener on the other side.
And that, my friends, is just a physical example. We tend to compare ourselves to each other in so many different areas: our looks, our marriages, our finances, our children, our stuff. Everyone has “issues” in their lives that they have to work through, regardless of the size of their bodies. Just as those who have not reached their ideal weight struggle with various things in their lives, smaller girls struggle too. We cannot assume that Miss Skinny Minnie’s life is perfect just because she is the size of a twig. Perhaps my super tiny skinny friends can devour everything in sight without gaining a single ounce, but I bet you a million dollars she struggles with something else in her life just like me: maybe it’s to much stress, maybe it’s a difficult family situation, or a medical problem. Who knows?
Satan wants us to believe that “she has it better.” He wants us to compare ourselves to others and then drown ourselves in self-pity. He wants us to focus on what we lack and forget the blessings that God has given us.
Don’t let him win. Be confident.
|Be confident in yourself.|
|And be confident in the Lord!|
I know how you feel about your girls not being able to fit in certain ouftits. I'm quite big chested myself. They've gone down since I've lost weight but they're not small – I'm a 32 DD (UK sizing). I hate it when I find a really cute dress, grab my size off the rack (no pun intended) and the zip simply won't go over my bust. I then trundle off to get the bigger size which goes over my bust but then is too big around my hips and waist. I swear they make dresses too small around the bust and too big around the waist and hips sometimes.
EXACTLY! That is the exact same problem I face! So frustrating!!!