I had put some healthy boundaries in place, surrounding myself with a like-minded friend, and replaced old lies in my mind with new truths. This new foundation began to slowly build, one day at a time. Healthy choices piled on top of each other day after day. Then, one day I woke up for the first time feeling incredibly empowered.
In 2011, my mind was full of so many lies that if I was Pinocchio, my nose would have probably wrapped around the entire world…twice. I struggled so deeply with negative body image that I came dangerously close to developing an eating disorder. On the outside, you would have never known how badly I was hurting. On the inside, I was dying. I was lost. I told myself over and over ugly lies about my body. I told myself over and over again that I was a failure. I told myself over and over that nothing could, or would ever get better.
You may recall the conversation I had with my husband that began my healing process. It wasn’t my husband that changed me. It was God using my husband to deliver that message, and it was God opening my heart to those words. It was then that I was able to begin replacing the lies with new truths.
You are made in His image.
Biblical beauty is far more beautiful than physical beauty.
Being able to physically exercise is a gift. Cherish it.
You are beautiful. Those stretch marks are a reminder that God trusts you with one of His little ones.
It was 14 months ago that my husband and I had that conversation. And it has taken that full 14 months to really grasp how lost I was. But that foundation has been building, one day at a time. The healthy choices I have made over the past year, not just physically, but spiritually and emotionally, have definately built upon one another and made me feel liberated from that dark place I was in. I still struggle from time to time. I still sometimes look in the mirror and see a flaw, but rather then dwell on it and find ugliness in it, I see something that, sure, it could use improvement, but it doesn’t define me.
It doesn’t define me!!!!
If you struggle with something like this, I pray that you will ask God to help you replace those lies with truths. I’m here to tell you, it’s not a quick fix. But it can change. You can find hope!