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"Even the Sparrow Knows:
Trusting your Savior with a Troubled Heart"

{Exploring Identity} Relationships

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Day 11 of Exploring Identity

For all the single ladies…

Being single doesn't mean you're weak..._副本

Sometimes it may feel as if everybody in the world is in a relationship except for you.  It makes you ask questions of yourself: what’s wrong with me? Am I not attractive?  Am I not loveable?  Why am I the one that’s still single?

The message of the world says you need a man.  You are only valuable if you are in a relationship.  What a bunch of crap! You are valuable regardless of whether or not you are in a relationship!  Our culture puts this in our head by idolizing Hollywood relationships, but do they last?  No.  Because they are not built on a true foundation of friendship and for most of them, Christ is not the center.  The message that Hollywood sends certainly can make us feel worthless.  But you are worth so much more!  There is a guy out there for you that God has picked out just for you and He will bring him to you in His timing.

For those in a relationship…


For many of us, our relationship with the man in our life gives us an awful lot of security, and we love to rely on that…Relationships can bring out enormous amounts of insecurity in us because they are so tied up with our identity. 

I long to make my husband happy.  I want to be the best wife I can be!  My husband does give me security, more than he probably knows.  He loves me with all his heart and I can feel it.  But just like any other couple, we have our moments and our disagreements.  I am very lucky because my husband and I are truly best friends and we work so well together.  (Thank you to the book LOVE AND RESPECT! It changed our lives!)  But I must admit, when we do argue over something big, my insecurities are revealed.  I have to remember that I am a strong, independent woman as well but I am also in a loving relationship that is a partnership.  My identity is not found solely in myself or my relationship though, it is found in Christ.

Psalm 139 reveals to us a sense of God’s love and care for us, even when we are full of insecurities, whether in a relationship or not.

O Lord, you’ve searched me and you know me.  You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar.  You discern my going out and my lying down.  You are familiar with all my ways.  Before a word is on my tongue, you know it completely, O Lord. –Psalm 139: 1-4

If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. –Psalm 139: 11-12

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. –Psalm 139: 23-24


This is a blog series: Exploring Identity!  If you missed any of the others posts, here they are!

Day 1- Known

Day 2- What is Identity?

Day 3- You are God’s Masterpiece

Day 4- Are you hiding?

Day 5- God doesn’t make Mistakes

Day 6- Mankind makes a Mess

Day 7- Turning Heads

Day 8- Getting the Idea?

Day 9- What Jesus Knew

Day 10- Beauty


Reader Interactions


  1. Beautiful post!!! Thank you so much for sharing. I do think our culture puts an unhealthy emphasis on relationships (especially since so many hasty relationships end badly). We do need to be encouraged to wait. I’m so glad I waited for my husband, and some of my friends have also waited and now have AMAZING men in their lives. It’s beautiful to see!
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    • It is beautiful! I think to many people get married with the mindset that if it doesn’t work out, then you can toss out that relationship and try again. I just can’t even comprehend that. When I married my husband, I had no doubts. I have never experienced any doubts about our relationship. If something hard comes our way, we will work through it. I’m thankful I waited for him and that he waited for me 🙂

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